Every August, I reflect on my “diagnosis-aversary,” or the anniversary of my rheumatoid arthritis (RA) diagnosis. Surprisingly, the most difficult part of my journey has not been:
➡️The disease itself*
➡️Navigating the insurance system (although that can be VERY stressful!)
➡️Dealing with impacts on my social life or even work.
The BIGGEST source of stress, at least for me and many people in my Rheum to THRIVE self-management and support groups, has been:
✅The RANDOMNESS and UNPREDICTABILITY* of flare-ups and worsening symptoms.
Why is uncertainty so hard?
The worst feeling is feeling like you’re doing “everything right” and the symptoms STILL rear their ugly heads.
It ends up feeling like you’re playing the “world’s worst game of whack-a-mole,” as one of my Rheum to THRIVE members said recently!
So….how can we respond to this uncertainty? The way I see it, we have two options:
- ➡️ We can look at this unpredictability as a problem to solve and keep searching for the next program or the next tool to finally “get the disease fully under control” – maybe it’s a diet, “hacking the nervous system,” exercise, different meds, etc. -or-
- ➡️ We can learn to accept that the unpredictability / randomness is the nature of the beast of chronic illness, and focus instead on ways to live fully and joyfully DESPITE what we can’t control.
The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off (Gloria Steinem)
Listen, “The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off” (Gloria Steinem).
It frustrates me that I can’t control everything but accepting this has absolutely set me free and given me more energy and time to devote to living life to the fullest, even within the limitations of my illnesses. I’ll never forget the time that my therapist helped me identify UNCERTAINTY as one of the hardest parts of living with chronic illness.
It was so deeply validating, and helped me get out of this cycle of always assuming that I would be less stressed “once I could just the disease under control.”
It’s possible to balance an acceptance mindset with a “fixing” mindset
✅There is absolutely a TIME and a PLACE for methods to control the disease, don’t get me wrong, and I utilize many of them (prescription medication, exercise, sleep, stress management, etc).
✅But there’s ALSO a time and place to consider ways to live more peacefully *alongside* the lingering uncertainty that remains for all of us living with chronic illness.
Learn more at my webinar!
If you’d like to learn more about my approach to reducing stress while living with chronic illness, I’d love to see you at my free webinar on Wednesday, August 28th.
✅ I’ll be holding it via Zoom at 7:30pm ET / 4:30pm PT, and I will send a link to the recording to everyone who registers!
✅ Comment “Webinar” to register for my stress management webinar, or go to bit.ly/chronic24
