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You’re Not Alone: What I’ve Learned from 200 Stories of Hope, Uncertainty, and Finding Your New Normal

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Summary:

On this special Episode 200 solo reflection, Cheryl looks back on the first 200 episodes of the Arthritis Life Podcast and distills the most meaningful lessons that have emerged from years of conversations with people living with inflammatory arthritis, along with clinicians, researchers, and patient-providers. 

Cheryl shares the origin story of the podcast, how it has evolved over time, and why storytelling remains at the center of her mission: helping people feel less alone, more informed, and more empowered to live well alongside chronic illness.

Cheryl then walks through nine core themes that keep resurfacing across these conversations, including: validation and belonging, coping with uncertainty, the power of community, navigating medication decisions, redefining “normal,” and why self-compassion, acceptance, identity, and joy still matter after diagnosis. 

This episode is an honest reflection on what it really means to “thrive” with arthritis, not as a one-size-fits-all outcome, but as a deeply personal, evolving process rooted in realistic hope, credible information, and human connection. 

Episode at a glance:

  • 01:31 The Origin Story of the Podcast
  • 06:27 Challenges and Reflections on Running the Podcast
  • 13:50 Nine Core Themes from 200 Episodes
  • 14:04 Theme 1: You Are Not Alone
  • 17:12 Theme 2: The Challenge of Uncertainty
  • 20:28 Theme 3: The Power of Community
  • 22:41 Theme 4: The Importance of Credible Education
  • 26:35 Theme 5: Emotional Medication Decisions
  • 29:01 Theme 6: Redefining Normal
  • 30:52 Theme 7: Acceptance and Self-Compassion
  • 32:58 Theme 8: RA as a Whole Life Condition
  • 33:59 Theme 9: Identity, Purpose, and Joy

Medical disclaimer: 

All content found on Arthritis Life public channels was created for generalized informational purposes only. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

Episode Sponsors

Rheum to THRIVE, an online course and support program Cheryl created to help people with rheumatic disease go from overwhelmed, confused and alone to confident, supported and connected. See all the details and join the program or waitlist now! 

Bio:

Cheryl Crow

Cheryl is an occupational therapist who has lived with rheumatoid arthritis for over twenty years. Her life passion is helping others with rheumatoid arthritis figure out how to live a full life despite arthritis, by developing tools to navigate physical, emotional and social challenges. She formed the educational company Arthritis Life in 2019 after seeing a huge need for more engaging, accessible, and (dare I say) FUN patient education and self-management resources.

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Full Episode Transcript:

[00:00:05] Cheryl Crow: All right. Welcome everyone. I’m so excited to be doing a solo episode for the first time in a little while. This is episode 200 of the Arthritis Life Podcast, and the timing is kind of perfect to do a reflection episode because I’ve been in a very nostalgic era lately. This has also been the five year anniversary of the creation, my creation of the Rheum to Thrive program, and the Arthritis Life platforms and the podcast itself. So, today, just to let you know kind of what’s gonna happen on this episode I’m gonna be distilling and reviewing some of the most important lessons and themes that have come up again and again from these 200 conversations that I’ve had on the first 200 episodes with primarily I’ve had [00:01:00] with other patients about their life stories and their wisdom and lessons learned, as well as some of the reflections from the experts I’ve interviewed and people like me who are both a patient and some sort of healthcare expert or healthcare provider.

[00:01:14] Cheryl Crow: So, I’m also gonna reflect a little bit at the beginning just about how the podcast started and how it’s evolved, and we’re gonna then discuss the nine core themes, and then we’re gonna talk about where this podcast is heading next, what might be the same, and what might be different coming down the pipeline.

[00:01:31] Cheryl Crow: So origin story, just to start and review some. I realized before this episode that I haven’t really explained how this podcast came to be or I haven’t really said it from start to finish. I think I’ve alluded to it, but point being, so back in 2019, actually, I had this vision of creating what I actually initially called the Arthritis Talk Show, and the idea was that I would be interviewing one of the patients again, doing a lot of what I do [00:02:00] on the podcast, but at the time, I didn’t think of it as a podcast. I thought of it as a video interview channel on YouTube, and I actually did my first couple interviews in late 2019, early 2020, and then the pandemic in, starting in March, 2020 caused me to pivot and realize, okay.

[00:02:18] Cheryl Crow: I need to I can’t have this vision of primarily in-person interviews anymore because of needing to shield and take precautions. And so, it’s one of these you know, necessity breeds invention or something like that. I remember around spring of 2020 thinking, okay, well, you know, I could take the audio of what I already have recorded these videos, these talk quote unquote talk show style videos, and turn that into a podcast and continue doing more interviews with people via Zoom, which, you know, if you don’t remember that 2020 is kind of when Zoom or the you know, video recording video conferencing software started taking off. So what I wanted to mention, because [00:03:00] this is just a little bit of a life lesson to begin with, is I remember distinctly in Spring 2020 thinking I’m already too late for the podcast bandwagon. There are too many podcasts. Like at first I thought, well, what more could I not like what could I bring? What more could I bring? ’cause I always think that I can bring something positive and unique to the world, but I just thought, who’s gonna listen to this? Because there’s so many other podcasts. And I think that’s, you know, now the podcast market has gotten even way more saturated since then.

[00:03:31] Cheryl Crow: But this podcast has found an audience and it’s all been organic marketing through social media really. And that’s the only way I know of that people find the podcast is either social media or my email list or word of mouth. So it’s the lesson I would say from that is it’s never too late to do something that you’re passionate about.

[00:03:52] Cheryl Crow: Even if you think, okay, well, like the podcast quote unquote, market is saturated.[00:04:00]

[00:04:00] Cheryl Crow: And I’ve ended up, you know, expanding these conversations to not only live on the podcast or the audio platform I’ve also started releasing the videos of our conversations, even if they’re quote unquote just Zoom conversation videos. ’cause it is nice, you know, depending on your learning style and your preferences to be able to see and watch me and the my guest if I have a guest speaking in real time. Some people prefer video, some people prefer audio. So you have your options. You can always watch the videos on the Arthritis Life YouTube channel or the website where I also include everything. So it’s been really great to be able to, you know, to have these conversations and to share them on YouTube and on social media.

[00:04:46] Cheryl Crow: I think short form video really exploded after I started this podcast as well. And I’ve now, we’ve grown to have the Rheumer Has It series within the Arthritis Life podcast with Eileen Davidson. So shout out to Eileen. She approached me with [00:05:00] the idea of doing more of a short, shorter episodes, but really targeted on answering like a specific research related question or answering a busting a myth, misconception or stigma about arthritis.

[00:05:13] Cheryl Crow: And that’s just started in 2025 and that’s been a really fun, kind of, evolution of the podcast as well. So, you know, the mission has really remained this same you know, really helping people understand through the power of storytelling, helping other patients improve their quality of life, feel less alone, understand tools that they can use to help them thrive despite having inflammatory arthritis.

[00:05:37] Cheryl Crow: And then you know, I think storytelling as humans is one of the most powerful ways we share information and learn. So, instead of just kind of being boring and let’s talk about this research article, we’ll sprinkle in the research throughout the storytelling. That’s one of my goals.

[00:05:56] Cheryl Crow: So. You know, and kind of emphasizing the fact that the [00:06:00] patients are experts in their own life and their own story, and then the health providers maybe who don’t have patient experience are experts in the science behind things. So can we find, I think as a middle child, I’m always trying to find like a middle ground, you know, and trying to kind of help us improve our overall ability to communicate between patients and providers and have a little bit of a less of an us versus them dynamic.

[00:06:27] Cheryl Crow: So I just wanna briefly say before I go into the nine major themes and nine major things I’ve learned over and over through these conversations, I wanna say that the ups and downs, you know, running something like the platform that I’ve been running primarily on my own for the last five years.

[00:06:44] Cheryl Crow: I mean, it’s been the ups and the positives have been really amazing. It’s been a roller coaster and the ups have been things like, you know, just those genuine moments of connection or the aha moments between me and the guest, or me and you all [00:07:00] who are listening, commenting on social media, sharing your own stories, hearing people’s feedback, that they feel less alone, that they feel more empowered. That’s my mission and my passion, and I think it’s one of those things like, you know, show don’t tell. Like we can say all day long that thriving looks different for each person. There’s no one size fits all.

[00:07:20] Cheryl Crow: But when you have 200 different stories and you see through the real and granular details of people’s lives that, yeah, thriving really doesn’t look the same or mean the same to each person, but we can have this kind of, what I call it, my stubborn optimism or my realistic sense of optimism and hope, which is that we can do our best to find ways to thrive even in the hardest circumstances, even when we don’t quote unquote heal or overcome our condition, we are just doing our best living alongside it. So that’s been a lot of the ups and just I’ve learned so much from the guests. So if you’re listening and you’re somebody who’s appeared on the podcast. Thank you. Thank you. If I haven’t already [00:08:00] said it enough, I don’t think I can say it enough.

[00:08:02] Cheryl Crow: And the downs, I will say just, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on my, you know, the hard thing for me has been that balancing how to, I’m like, how do I even put this into words? But with social media.

[00:08:18] Cheryl Crow: The, I could be active all day every day and never sleep and still feel like I’m not responding to every comment or I’m behind, or I’m not. Like I have this kind of voracious appetite to always be doing more, and sometimes that is channeled in a positive way, but other times that’s channeled in a way that causes me to feel burnout.

[00:08:39] Cheryl Crow: And it’s like unnecessary levels of burnout. So I’ve honestly talked to my own therapist about this stuff and I’m still working on it in 2026. I want to find a better balance and ability to say, okay, this is what I’m doing is enough and I can leave things not perfect.

[00:08:55] Cheryl Crow: It’s kind of a little bit of a recovering perfectionism [00:09:00] things sprinkled in there, but just finding better boundaries and being okay to say I have an opinion on everything. Right? And I wanna help everyone. Like when I see misinformation, when I see things that stress me out online, because it’s from a place of wanting to help others and not wanting people to be misguided, but I am not the savior of the world.

[00:09:19] Cheryl Crow: Right? It’s kind of almost like I need a little bit of humility to be like, do the best you can and then leave it and then engage in your real life, quote unquote, you know, not just your social media life. So that’s something, you know, I’m not a digital native. I was born in 1981, so I’m still learning, how to have boundaries and stuff like that.

[00:09:38] Cheryl Crow: And I also think that there’s, if I’m really totally honest with myself, it’s like there’s this pride I’ve had and like I’ve built this by myself. And I, you know, even though I’m a very relational person, I take pride in this is my platform. It’s really my voice but I need to kind of get over that.

[00:09:54] Cheryl Crow: I think because I need to delegate more if, and I, you can’t be like, I can’t, I’m self coaching [00:10:00] myself to be like, you can’t be like, I wanna have the pride of doing it all on my own. But then I’m confused and over like why as to why I’m overwhelmed. It’s ’cause you’re not delegating anything. It’s ’cause you’re doing it all on your own.

[00:10:10] Cheryl Crow: So I’ve been delegating more the last couple years. Like I have Katheryn and Lauren who’ve both helped with different parts of the business and so I really realized that, you know, I’m stronger. I can still have a big impact and actually maybe even a bigger impact if I delegate more and have a team supporting me.

[00:10:27] Cheryl Crow: So all of that is just my own little reflections. But on the process, you know, peeling back the curtain of what it’s been like to run this. I’ve definitely learned a lot about technology and I’ve learned a lot about storytelling and I think I’ve also, I wanna, I guess, reflect on what I’ve learned as a host.

[00:10:44] Cheryl Crow: I’ve learned the importance of checking in with my guests beforehand as to what their preferred style is. ’cause I have a little bit of the ADHD type, like I have a very fast processing speed and, but low inhibition when it comes to [00:11:00] talking and verbal output. So there’s a saying for some types of hyperactive ADHD, it’s like a Ferrari.

[00:11:06] Cheryl Crow: Ferrari with bicycle breaks, like that’s my brain sometimes. And so if I have a guest that needs a little bit more processing time, I think I’ve done a better job over time of allowing people to actually process before I jump in and maybe interrupt them. I know I’ve needed to work on that as well too.

[00:11:27] Cheryl Crow: So I’m proud of myself for some of those improvements and, and I think can continue to improve over the next 200 episodes.

[00:11:38] Cheryl Crow: So, on the note of kind of finding ways to still have a positive impact on the world that aren’t as energetically taxing to me I’m thinking about simplifying things for the future of the podcast and potentially even having seasons to it. So it’s not this endless it’s so meaningful and I love it, but [00:12:00] also I feel at times like I do better when I have a rhythm of like work and then rest rather than continuously.

[00:12:07] Cheryl Crow: So there’s gonna be a little bit of a change in that, but I haven’t exactly figured out the timeline yet. And there’s also gonna be some more. Right now I’m in the process of training certified Rheum to Thrive facilitators, which I’m extremely excited about. ’cause that’s gonna allow me to have more times offered in different time zones that work for people’s work schedules and life schedules.

[00:12:29] Cheryl Crow: And so I’m gonna be featuring those facilitators on the podcast a little more. So you get to know them and decide if you wanna join one of their groups. So that’s really exciting. So, I’m also working on a book, so you’re like, okay, wait, you’re saying that you’re like doing too much and need to slow down, and then also working on things.

[00:12:49] Cheryl Crow: Well, I need to slow down certain things like my social media output and my podcast output so that I can have the time to finish training the facilitators and work on a book based on the [00:13:00] Rheum to Thrive trademarked framework so that I could reach even more people and help people.

[00:13:05] Cheryl Crow: Again, my real core goal is to educate, empower, and support people with inflammatory arthritis. And so I think a book is a great way to do that as well as my current like course and, paid course and paid group support program and then all the free offerings. But I think a book is just, honestly, it’s just on my life bucket list.

[00:13:22] Cheryl Crow: I’ve always wanted to write a book. I actually have eight different book ideas. This is the first one. There’s a couple fiction ones in there, so stay tuned on that. But we’ll see how it goes, and I’ll definitely be announcing more about that. So I’m really gonna think about more sustainable ways of continuing to have an impact without kind of unnecessarily maybe being on like a hamster wheel of content that I’ve just unconsciously been on at times.

[00:13:47] Cheryl Crow: So that’s my reflections going into episode 200. Now let’s go to the nine core themes, which were so, so fun and interesting and illuminating to look back on the first 200 episodes and see [00:14:00] the themes. So let’s go.

[00:14:04] Cheryl Crow: Okay, so the first theme, now I used some technology tools to analyze all of the transcripts of the conversations that I’ve had and figured out what are these core themes, the first of these nine themes of these conversations on the podcast is that you are not alone and your experience is valid.

[00:14:26] Cheryl Crow: So that’s something that I don’t know about you all, but 22 years after having my diagnosis, I still need to hear that like constantly and it’s so reassuring and validating to hear that. And you know, looking back over the previous episodes, I wanted to pick out a couple just highlights, like from the one with Marissa on episode 88 she said when she was first diagnosed, it felt very conflicting and bittersweet. But having a framework or diagnosis or just direction at all was a relief, even if it meant having a chronic [00:15:00] illness. So I think there’s this very common like mixture of emotions. I think people who don’t have experience with chronic illness tend to think, oh, you’re either gonna be like super, super uniformly unhappy or super uniformly relieved to have a diagnosis when really it’s all a conflicting swirl of emotions.

[00:15:20] Cheryl Crow: Side note, a lot of my arthritis friends recently have had their diagnosis changed. So that’s also a phenomenon that can be really confusing ’cause you’re like, okay, even if you didn’t want your first diagnosis, you at least maybe spent some time learning about it and wrapping your head around it and then having to change your diagnosis. It brings this weird paradoxical response of well, I didn’t want my first one, but at least it’s like the devil I know versus this new unknown. So that’s another thing that’s happened to some of the people on our podcast too.

[00:15:50] Cheryl Crow: And Brianna Ramos in episode 1 0 7 said, you know, she didn’t even register that a lot of her early symptoms were not normal. I [00:16:00] think that’s really common as well to feel like well, this is just aging and this is just growing up. Everyone feels this way. And that’s something I wanted to highlight.

[00:16:09] Cheryl Crow: And Kara Wata on episode 1 67, she had a really great reflection. Now as somebody, if you don’t remember, she has Sjogren’s disease and she is a doctor and she said, you know, she learned so much more from the Sjogren’s community and the autoimmune community than she did from her medical education regarding, you know, just what it takes to really live well with these conditions and manage them. And so, the other little highlight was a reframe that I had where, you know, trying to think, instead of thinking my body’s betraying you or betraying me, trying to think of it as my body’s communicating or my body’s trying to do the right thing, but it’s making mistakes and we’re all humans.

[00:16:56] Cheryl Crow: So bringing that kind of self-compassionate lens. So, just [00:17:00] know that again, you know it. It is common to whatever you have felt. Someone else has felt this too. So you are not alone and your experience is valid. That’s theme one.

[00:17:12] Cheryl Crow: Theme two is that the uncertainty is often harder than the pain or the other symptom itself.

[00:17:20] Cheryl Crow: Now that doesn’t, not always the case, but I think just for me, I remember pretty vividly the first time my therapist even just brought up the concept of uncertainty to me said in that therapeutic process way of it sounds like uncertainty is a trigger for your anxiety.

[00:17:36] Cheryl Crow: And I was like, duh. You know, but on the one hand I’m like, duh, uncertainty sucks. But like in my head I was like, and the goal is to fix it, to get certainty. So yeah, I don’t like uncertainty, so I need to find the answers. And she was like help me realize that there’s a limit to the answers we can find.

[00:17:58] Cheryl Crow: Right? And we [00:18:00] have to learn how to cope with the fundamental, like unsolvable parts of uncertainty versus just seeing it as a problem to fix. So I think that, I’ve said this a lot of times, but I’ll say it again ’cause this is like a reflection episode and maybe it’s the first episode you’ve listened to. So, welcome if this is.

[00:18:19] Cheryl Crow: I think it’s really normal at first to approach the problem of chronic illness as a solvable problem and just fixate on, okay, I’m gonna figure it all out. And the downside of that approach is that it can prevent you from recognizing that there’s gonna be, at some point, it’s like the elephant in the room is that there is gonna be some inherent unpredictability or uncertainty to health conditions in general and really to life in general.

[00:18:47] Cheryl Crow: Even if you’re the most perfectly healthy, able bodied person, you know, at this exact moment. There’s no guarantees for tomorrow. There’s just kind of fundamental uncertainty about the future. So for me, back to my therapist and [00:19:00] being able to name it and recognize oh, this is uncertainty. I don’t like this, but I don’t have to jump to fixing it or solving it or trying to delude myself to thinking that I could absolutely eliminate uncertainty because we can’t.

[00:19:17] Cheryl Crow: So, that’s that paradox of acceptance where it sounds at first like it would be depressing or like giving up, but actually it’s a relief. Because it’s preventing me from wasting energy on something that I’m not gonna ever be able to get to the bottom of and allows me to focus on, okay, well what can, what is it that I do know about my life right now?

[00:19:37] Cheryl Crow: And so just know that if you’re at a stage where you’re really battling uncertainty or I was just talking to one of my friends in a different situation in her life about having a unplanned job change. And I said, you know, my therapist just calls it riding the waves of uncertainty.

[00:19:51] Cheryl Crow: And I think even just having a visual for it, having a name for it is really important. And certainly in the stories of the first 200 interviews and [00:20:00] episodes we’ve had on the Arthritis Life Podcast, it’s something that unifies all of us that we have to cope with uncertainty. I think one of the most important tools for me in coping with that is self-compassion and also connecting to community, to others, and reminding myself, like through support groups or through social engagement with others with chronic illness is that it’s not that I’m doing it wrong and everyone else has the answers and I miss something. We’re all just doing the best we can.

[00:20:25] Cheryl Crow: So, theme three. I didn’t even mean to set this up so perfectly, but theme three is community with people who get it changes everything. And I am not just talking about my own Rheum to Thrive communities and cohorts, but also other nonprofit or many nonprofits and other like patient groups and advocacy organizations have also provided that social community social interaction.

[00:20:53] Cheryl Crow: Courtney Bruce, for example, on the episode were about parenting a child with juvenile idiopathic arthritis talked about how the Arthritis [00:21:00] Foundation has given us so much. It’s a very positive way for me to deal with my daughter’s diagnosis. And Brianna Ramos again said, I’ve been involved in advocacy and volunteering with the arthritis community since my diagnosis, and she’s talked a lot on her channel about how valuable and meaningful it’s been for her to be a volunteer. And I certainly have found that myself being a volunteer for the last 15 years for the Arthritis Foundation, whether that’s the in-person juvenile, arthritis family camps, or it’s the arthritis advocacy Hill Day is like where we go to the state capitol or the Nations capitol, or the Pathways Conference, which really engages volunteers.

[00:21:37] Cheryl Crow: Which by the way, that’s gonna be in Seattle in March, 2026. So if you’re listening to this before, then please come visit me in Seattle. That would be so fun. But yeah, someone else said, I don’t need advice. I need people who understand. So I thought that was really beautiful. And we certainly had people on the podcast from the Rheum to Thrive groups talk about how that’s been such a lifeline to them.

[00:21:59] Cheryl Crow: So my advice to [00:22:00] you or that from this theme is to really find your support system. And it doesn’t have to be all people with chronic illness. It can be your family, your friends, your coworkers. Find a support system that feels authentic and real and helpful for you. And that will make a huge difference.

[00:22:18] Cheryl Crow: And I’m very social, so I’m maybe a little bit biased, but I think most people will find it easier to get through the ups and downs of chronic illness with a community. Whether that’s a small micro community, you know, two or three people versus a large one like me, I kind of like connecting with the whole world of people with arthritis through social media and podcasts and stuff like that.

[00:22:41] Cheryl Crow: So theme four is education is empowering when it’s credible and compassionate. So I think this is pretty, pretty self-evident. But I think what I’m trying to get at here with this theme is that the credibility of [00:23:00] your sources matters a lot.

[00:23:02] Cheryl Crow: And as I’ve pivoted a little bit more again with the episodes with Eileen on really disentangling or dispelling myths and dispelling misinformation because it’s a huge concern to me that I think everyone should be free to make up their own minds about what’s the right choice for their body for how they’re going to manage their condition, whether that’s with pharmaceuticals or with lifestyle interventions.

[00:23:28] Cheryl Crow: But you should be empowered to make those decisions from a basis of evidence-based information and not biased information. So being so active on social media, whilst the social part is such a lifeline, what I’ve noticed and that’s concerned me, is that there’s a lot of misinformation. And in fact, if we go back to theme two about uncertainty, the thing is that it’s almost like the more there’s a fundamental human a process where [00:24:00] we don’t like uncertainty, it makes us uncomfortable and anxious, and therefore the people who want to sell snake oil, understand that and they will couch or frame their snake oil solutions in a way that is meant to prey upon our drive for certainty and say, this thing is gonna help, is gonna be what fixes your RA.

[00:24:25] Cheryl Crow: And there’s just this little unfortunate storm where it’s like the more scientifically credible people are going to acknowledge fundamental uncertainties. You know, a true expert acknowledges that there’s always something unknown in their field, right? But somebody who isn’t such a true expert will be like, no, this is it.

[00:24:44] Cheryl Crow: Doctors aren’t telling you the truth, you know, the conspiracy theory type stuff. So, there’s, Erin, on episode 62, I thought this was really interesting to revisit. She said, when she did the Rheum to Thrive program, she said, I was so surprised how empowered it made me feel instead of completely [00:25:00] terrifying me.

[00:25:01] Cheryl Crow: And I think that a lot of times patients, I’m not saying this happened with Erin but that they refuse to learn about their condition initially as a form of denial. You know, if I don’t learn about this, if I don’t join this group, if I don’t join a program, or don’t read a book or read a website, then it’s not real.

[00:25:20] Cheryl Crow: And I was really happy to hear that when she did the program, obviously she did say that it made her feel a lot better. So it’s sometimes, you know, Gittel had said said this in a previous episode too. Knowledge is power, but ignorance is bliss. Like sometimes the truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.

[00:25:35] Cheryl Crow: Or first it might stress you out. You know, that first it will piss you off is Gloria Steinem quote. But you know, it can be hard to learn information. I had a moment at the 2025 ACR conference where they were talking about how RA causes accelerated aging, which I didn’t realize the extent to which it does that.

[00:25:52] Cheryl Crow: And it was, it’s not comfortable to know that it’s not, it doesn’t make me happy, but it’s important to know knowledge is power. [00:26:00] So, Marissa said, you know, Google and Reddit were full of rabbit holes and she was happy when she joined the Rheum to Thrive program, that she had more credible information.

[00:26:08] Cheryl Crow: And you know, Corey, who’s a nurse practitioner in rheumatology in Seattle, said, you know, helping patients really understand what their conditions and diseases is what makes our day. I thought that was a sweet quote. So, you don’t need to be a medical expert to be a good patient.

[00:26:25] Cheryl Crow: Just one of the most important things is just finding a list of trustworthy sources of information is just what I would leave you with for that theme.

[00:26:34] Cheryl Crow: Theme five. I love this one, and it wasn’t one that I would’ve outlined like when I first started this, but it makes perfect sense is that medication decisions are emotional, not just medical. So in a lot of the episodes we’ve talked about the decisions to whether to start and when to start medications for rheumatoid arthritis and similar conditions and reviewing the evidence for that. And it’s one thing to know [00:27:00] logically that the medications are effective, but our emotions don’t always respond to that, right?

[00:27:04] Cheryl Crow: The emotions are often still fearful or frustrated or sad or angry. So I think sharing the stories about how people have contended with starting and stopping and changing medications is really important. It’s something that I wish I had access to when I was diagnosed in 2003.

[00:27:24] Cheryl Crow: ’cause with the first time I had to switch medications, I thought that it was, it shocked me. I didn’t know it could happen, and I thought I must have done something wrong. I didn’t know it was something that just happens with autoimmune diseases sometimes. I thought that. Oh, I was also gonna say that we did, you know, I want people to not have biased information, like I said on theme four, but also understand that, you know, there are rare cases where people do have major side life altering side effects of medications and those stories needed to be heard too. So this has big been a platform for people to share their genuine, true stories. [00:28:00] We’ve had many stories of people, the majority of stories that people have had are consistent with the scientific evidence, which is that these medications are life changing in a positive sense for the majority of patients. And they put the disease into remission at higher levels than have been seen any other time in history especially when compared to prior to the advent of these meds. But that doesn’t mean that the people who’ve had side effects stories shouldn’t be heard.

[00:28:22] Cheryl Crow: You know, their stories are important too. So, know that if it’s hard for you to start meds, you’re not alone. And that hearing other people’s success stories or hearing people’s stories can help you, you know, feel more okay with that decision.

[00:28:37] Cheryl Crow: Theme six. We have three more to go.

[00:28:40] Cheryl Crow: Thank you for bearing with me here. Solo episodes can be a little long to listen to sometimes, but I enjoy reflecting on all this and I’m just imagining those of you listening as I’m talking, so I listen to a lot of podcasts. I’m usually doing like errands driving or, you know, putting the dishes away or something.

[00:28:56] Cheryl Crow: So I’m imagining you listening while you’re doing those daily [00:29:00] activities. But I love this theme. It’s this ones that definitely didn’t surprise me, which is that thriving doesn’t necessarily mean returning to your pre-diagnosis normal. In one of my favorite episodes, which is a solo episode, you know, can you live a normal life with rheumatoid arthritis?

[00:29:15] Cheryl Crow: I realized I did that episode because I realized that was a search term that led people to my website. I figured out how to do those analytics and I was surprised because it wasn’t a question that I had outright answered, but I had answered it implicitly through some of my other content. What I said in that episode is you probably won’t get this same exact normal that you wanted or that you had before your diagnosis, but you can find a new normal that you can learn to love. And that’s again, embodying this sense. That’s really important to me of like realistic hope, right?

[00:29:48] Cheryl Crow: Not just, you know, I wish I could just have this podcast be like rheumatoid arthritis or arthritis answers, you know, arthritis fix, fixing arthritis podcast. How we fix it. That’s still a [00:30:00] a big preference in my head, right, of course we’d wanna fix it if it’s fixable. But given that it’s not completely fixable for everyone a hundred percent of the time until there’s a cure, can we learn to pivot and adapt to this new normal?

[00:30:15] Cheryl Crow: Can we redefine a normal that? Can love as much as our previous one? Or just learn to embrace and tolerate even if it’s not as perfect? ’cause no one really gets a perfect life. So, you know, Amber said, doesn’t mean that you’re never gonna be able to do the things you love. You just maybe have, it might have to look different.

[00:30:32] Cheryl Crow: That was on episode 1 51. I really liked that. So, I want to reiterate that, you know, thriving doesn’t necessarily mean returning to your pre-diagnosis normal, but you can find a new normal.

[00:30:47] Cheryl Crow: Okay, so last two are theme seven, or sorry, last three. Self-compassion and acceptance are turning points.

[00:30:56] Cheryl Crow: So I know in Kristi Williams’ story, you know, she agreed with me [00:31:00] that like acceptance can take a long time to wrap your head around ’cause it can feel like settling or it sounds like settling, but true acceptance like in terms of taking what’s offered life is offering you this. You’re choosing to take it rather than pushing it away or being in denial or saying that I can’t have this.

[00:31:19] Cheryl Crow: I just can’t deal with it. You’re saying, I’m going to take this and I’m going to bring it with me on my journey towards having a vibrant, beautiful life. That is includes challenges, right? A big life is gonna include a mixture of things. A big, full life is gonna include, according to Russ Harris the author of The Happiness Trap.

[00:31:41] Cheryl Crow: You know, a full life includes the full range of human emotions. We can’t just be happy all the time. That’s not really ever been the human condition at any point in history or time. So, understanding that, being willing to accept your condition and, you know, bring [00:32:00] all those uncertainties and challenges along the ride with, you can actually, it builds your capacity to tolerate suffering, which is, for me at least, it’s generalized to other areas of my life that are challenging outside of my chronic illness.

[00:32:13] Cheryl Crow: So that’s been really cool. And you know, I also liked it was episode 83 with Nitka Chopra. She said, I’m learning that acceptance and hope or acceptance and thriving are not mutually exclusive.

[00:32:27] Cheryl Crow: So I think that’s been one of the most fascinating kind of conversations that I’ve had with multiple guests is how do we learn to embrace this idea of acceptance rather than being scared of it. And, you know, understand that acceptance doesn’t mean giving up. It involves in, in that process of act or acceptance and commitment therapy, it involves turning off the struggle switch or the struggle with life as it is in the present moment and turning towards what’s still possible. So I love that.

[00:32:57] Cheryl Crow: Theme eight. RA is a whole [00:33:00] body, whole life condition though, that it’s, in other words, it’s not just joint pain, which you’ve heard many guests talk about, including myself. And you know, that’s one of the things actually in the most popular episode of the podcast, which is the five things I Wish I had known when I was diagnosed. One of the ones is that I wish I had known that I thought RA was just a joint condition and I was confused when I had these other systemic symptoms. So understanding that it really is a whole life condition, and in fact many guests, you know, have said that the fatigue. I know Eileen has said this too, Eileen Davidson.

[00:33:33] Cheryl Crow: The fatigue has been more life altering than pain for many people. So know that if you’re having these systemic symptoms like brain fog, fatigue and just overall emotional overwhelm you’re not alone. And and you know, getting the disease under control, whether that’s through medications and or lifestyle can help certainly alleviate that and slow down the disease process. But there might still be some lingering symptoms.

[00:33:59] Cheryl Crow: And the [00:34:00] last one, theme nine, is that identity, purpose, and joy still belong to you. I love that name Joy. Or the word joy. And you know, I had said I love revisiting these old transcripts and old quotes and the five things I wish I had known when I was diagnosed is that, you know, managing RA is a job.

[00:34:18] Cheryl Crow: It’s an unpaid job, unpaid internship. But you can learn how to do it. It’s a learnable job. And you know, living a good life. And I always ask everyone what does it mean to you to thrive or live a good life with your condition? A lot of times it’s being able to still do the things that make you feel like yourself.

[00:34:36] Cheryl Crow: That’s one of the things that Amber Connell said on episode 1 51 and, you know, understanding that you have a core self, a core value to your being and your life, and that you could still live according to those values, even if it looks different than it did. Pre-diagnosis is huge. And hopefully that’s really empowering to you.

[00:34:58] Cheryl Crow: I feel empowered by [00:35:00] that as well. So those were the nine themes. It was really fun to look back. There’s so many more things I could say, and if I had more time I would actually get the clips of the quotes, but that actually takes quite a long time. Those of you who’ve ever done any audio editing will know what I’m saying.

[00:35:15] Cheryl Crow: So, I just read, I read them out from the transcripts, but I just, you know, to have some concluding thoughts. I really want to thank everyone who’s listened. This podcast has been listened to and downloaded in over a hundred countries, which, that really surprised me when I looked into the analytics, like in a, surprised me in a happy way.

[00:35:32] Cheryl Crow: And the majority listeners are like in English speaking. countries like the United States, Canada, and the UK. We certainly have people all over the world and all the continents, except I’m not sure about Antarctica. But I really, I appreciate your time and you joining me really on this journey of trying to figure out how to not just survive, but thrive with our conditions even when we can’t fully fix the underlying issues. So, I want to [00:36:00] reinforce and remind you all that you know, your stories matter. Whether you ever feel like motivated or what would the word be? Inspired to share your story in a public arena like I have. That’s just my choice. That makes sense in the context of my personality and my life.

[00:36:15] Cheryl Crow: You know, your journey is still valid and it still matters even if you’ve only shared it with yourself or with one other person you know, in your life. There’s many different ways. I think one of the most important things is there’s many ways to thrive. It looks different for each person, whether even you know, five people who have the same diagnosis, same age. They might have really different techniques and things that work. So for me, it helps me to hear the different people’s stories. So we’ll continue highlighting different stories and then you know, interviewing experts, helping bust myths, helping, you know, educate, empower, and support you on your arthritis journey.

[00:36:55] Cheryl Crow: If that word resonates with you and you know, please, [00:37:00] if you, if there’s anything you’d like to do to support the podcast, people have asked that. I don’t have a Patreon or anything like that, but if you don’t, if you can do one thing, it would, if you don’t mind, I would love you to rate and review this podcast wherever you listen.

[00:37:15] Cheryl Crow: So most people listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, somewhere on YouTube. Those, the rating and reviewing helps people, and especially sharing, it helps people discover whether you share that in a Facebook group or with a friend or over email. Or just verbally that will help they get discovered. Again, it’s all been word of mouth.

[00:37:32] Cheryl Crow: I haven’t done any paid advertising at this point and the podcast has for the most part been really independently produced. I have occasionally had short term like sponsors for the podcast, which just helps pay for you know, I do pay for podcast hosting and all the you know, the time compensate me for the time it takes to put these episodes together and do all the editing and all that fun stuff.

[00:37:57] Cheryl Crow: But it’s just been, it’s been a really fun [00:38:00] ride. And I yeah when I first put the first episode out in June 2020, it was such, that was such a unique time in history. I’m not sure what I imagined it was going to be like in 2026, but it’s certainly been more there. It’s been more of a deeper impact than I could have hoped and so I love hearing the responses.

[00:38:21] Cheryl Crow: I love hearing people’s reflections. I just got an email from somebody who had listened to an episode that really resonated with them, so please, you know, you can always go to the Arthritis Life website, my arthritis life.net and leave a comment there, or a email. So I guess there’s lots of ways you can support this podcast, but just even just by listening you’re supporting me and supporting everyone who’s shared their stories.

[00:38:45] Cheryl Crow: So, yeah. Last thank you would be to everyone who’s taking the time to share their story on this podcast. ’cause I appreciate you and I appreciate that there’s a lot of emotional labor. And energetic labor that goes into sharing your story. So thank you and I look forward to [00:39:00] the next 200 episodes.

[00:39:02] Cheryl Crow: All right, bye-bye for now.

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